Masks

Masks

Do you ever feel like you are wearing a mask? I do. But I’ve gotten so used to it that i hardly notice it anymore. I constantly have it on. It’s one of those masks that looks like it’s in a permi-smile. I can’t take it off i need it. It hides the truth lying just underneath. If i take it off I’m Vulnerable. I don’t have time to be vulnerable. I don’t have the luxury of letting down my guard. Behind the mask there are tears on my cheek and hurt in my eyes but none can see. It’s like my secret that i can’t talk about. No one wants to hear about it anyhow. All others want to see is happy. They don’t want to know what is behind it. To them the superficial smile the mask provides is enough. Behind the mask tears can silently fall while maintaining the look that everything is ok.  What no one can see is the thoughts in my head. The constant wondering of what i did wrong. Why I’m not good enough. They can’t see the worry and anxiety in my furrowed brows. So i keep it on. So no one else can be bothered with my trivial life. Because who cares any ways.  In the grand scheme of this world masks are all anyone sees anyhow.